Whilst bleeding hearts around him flowed

There are three main schools of Valentine's Day philosophy. The first line of thought--generally propounded by people in love--holds that love is glorious, and that roses, truffles, diamonds, and Cupids are perfect emblems thereof. The second school dresses in black and mutters about commercialism; the third urges us all to Love Ourselves.

Then there's the historical view of the holiday: take Samuel Pepys's diary entry from Feb. 14, 1661. (Sir William Batten, born in 1600, was Pepys's superior at the Naval Board; "Mrs. Martha" was his spinster daughter; Mingo was his black servant. According to the DNB, "Pepys grew to detest Batten and supposed the feeling to be reciprocated. Batten was certainly infuriated by Pepys telling him his business, not least because the younger man was so often right." But forget that, for now.)

"14. Valentine's Day. Up earely and to Sir W. Battens. But would not go in till I had asked whether they that opened the door was a man or a woman. And Mingo, who was there, answered 'a Woman;' which, with his tone, made me laugh.

"So up I went and took Mrs. Martha for my Valentine (which I do only for complacency), and Sir W. Batten, he goes in the same manner to my wife. And so we were very merry.

"About 10 a-clock we with a great deal of company went down by our barge to Deptford; and there only went to see how forward Mr. Pett's yacht is. And so all into the barge again, and so to Woolwich on board the Rosebush, Captain Brown's ship, that is brother-in-law to Sir W. Batten - where we had a very fine dinner dressed on shoare. And great mirth and all things successefull - the first time I ever carried my wife a-shipboard - as also my boy Waineman, who hath all this day been called 'young Pepys', as Sir W. Pen's boy 'young Pen'.

"So home by barge again; good weather, but pretty cold."

I like this version of the holiday, because it doesn't imply that you must spend the day with your One True Love. The unmarried Martha Batten would have had a worse time of it in 2009 (though Pepys found her unpleasant, and refused to be her Valentine in 1662). And it's nice to see the skirt-chasing Pepys taking part in such an innocent tradition.

(Do you have any idea how hard it is to find Restoration images online? Google always thinks I mean furniture restoration. And, yes, I know that Vien is far too late and Titian is far too early. My long seventeenth century is very long, okay?)